The McCain Obama Marathon

So who watched the debate yesterday?

Your collective silence tells me one of two things.
1. You are burned out with the entire political process, along with being jaded and possibly panic-stricken into catatonia by the current economic crisis
2. No-one is reading this blog.

Undaunted, I shall continue. Let's leave aside our political leanings for a second. I enjoy watching the political pundits discuss the relative merits of each candidate afterwards and usually it's only a matter of time before the inevitable sports metaphors step up and, in a folksy accent, wink at the audience.

Paraphrasing, here are some of the things I heard...
"McCain needed Obama to fumble and for McCain to be able to recover that fumble and take it into the endzone for a touchdown"
"Obama was like a boxer who knows he has enough points to win and is content to dance around the ring avoiding the big hits until the final bell goes off"
"McCain needed a game changer"
"There was no repeat of the six-point sixth end Canada managed over Finland in the 2006 Winter Olympics Curling gold medal game, and unfortunately, that did not bode well for McCain here"

OK, I made up the last one, but you get the point. Anyway, given my current quest, I was trying to think of a suitable marathon metaphor for last night's debate, and the state of the campaigns in general.

McCain is the seasoned runner, who once heroically came back from a career-threatening injury years ago to once again be a force. He runs with Nike Air Jordan IIs, and believes bloody nipples are a badge of honor, not something to be hidden. Years of dedication to the sport has led to an impeccable, but possibly outdated track record. Sensing this, he chose as his training partner and pace setter Sarah Palin, who led him to a PR in the first 5k but now appears disoriented and confused, no longer able to name a single brand of sports drink.

Obama is the young buck with the superior tactics and Saucony shoes. Choosing Joe Biden as his pace-setter brought him a generally reliable guy but one who is slightly accident prone and occasionally takes the wrong turn or steps on potholes. Leading for most of the race, he unfortunately spent too long in the bathroom at mile 13, allowing McCain to come back strong.

For a while, the two runners are more or less neck and neck, but then, with just a few miles to go, both resort to dirty tricks... the pace setters start hocking loogies and Palin throws an empty water cup. Obama ignores her altogether and instead sticks out a leg, which McCain stumbles over. Commentators and spectators decry the tactics, but both stick up their middle fingers and continue anyway.

Finally, Obama makes his move and with just a couple of miles still to go, appears to have an impressive lead. But McCain has been counted out before, and he might still have some tricks up his sleeve.